My computer is broken.

We were trying to do the right thing and protect ourselves by installing an anti-virus thing and it completely fried our whole computer. You can't do anything on it. Because we lead such busy lives we have not had a chance to try and fix it. There are parts of me that are glad that it isn't working. There is no more wasted time playing solitaire or other mindless games. We have all had to find other things to do to occupy our time. I have read some really good books and my kids have been forced to use their imaginations to find fun things to do. The down side is that I can't just check my e-mail whenever I want. We have to go to my mom's house whenever we want to use the computer. So, school projects, balancing the checkbook, reading blogs, all of the important things I need my computer for, have all become small inconveniences. My kids look for any excuse to go to their grandparents house anyway so all of this has just given them another reason. So, I would like to thank my parents for opening up their home for their computerless children. (I knew buying a house right down the street from my parents would have its advantages.)

I have been working with the youth group at my church for the past few months. I must say ( just in case any of those involved ever read this) that it is one of the best youth groups I have ever been in or worked with. No really, there are some great people, I don't want to call them kids , involved in this group. All those involved have a real heart for the Lord and a hunger to learn. Last night we watched a short video on what some teens think of their parents. It made me realize some things about myself that I had been trying to deny. I am turning into my mother. Which I must say really isn't a bad thing, my mother is a wonderful person. I'm talking about the mom part of my mother, not the person she is outside of being a mother. I hope that makes sense. Here is an example: all of my childhood there were certain phrases that my mom said to me that I was sure I would never say to my kids because I thought they were dumb. Like " I am not your maid" , "Make up your mind, either play inside or outside, but just quit slamming the door" ." You may only have one bowl of ice cream per day." "The only reason you should ever touch your sister is to hug her or shake her hand and since I know you don't have any intention of doing either of those you should never touch your sister." Where did she come up with those? I finally discovered the answer. When you become a parent those words just automatically become part of your vocabulary. One day you are just going about your business, cleaning house and you hear yourself say those dreaded words, " If you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all." Then you stop in your tracks and realize what has just happened. Maybe I am the only one this has ever happened to. But, last night listening to the teens and the adults talk I realized a few things. I didn't have to pay the electric bill so it didn't matter to me if I left the back door open. I didn't have to buy the groceries or take care of someone with an upset stomach, so the rationing of food seemed pointless to me. I also thought that "because I said so" was a ridiculous answer to my questions of "why do I have to do this?". Obviously from the title of my blog you can see I have changed my mind on that one. I read a book on parenting that said that "because I said so" is a valid answer because as a parent I don't always need to give a reason. I am the parent and sometimes that means a dictatorship rather than a democracy. If kids could understand that "because I said so" doesn't translate into " I don't think you are worthy of a real answer so I am just going to give you some stupid, simplistic quote so you will go away and leave me alone", that it really translates into " I love and care for you deeply and I am tring to do the best that I can to help you grow and learn. I know some things that you don't so just trust that No matter how you feel I really have your best interest in mind."
There are times though when it is just an easy answer.